Friday, February 10, 2006
The Red Robin smelled like BO yesterday
Well, it totally did. Just saying.
So yeah, met the alleged sperm donor, and that was what it was. I mean, I have a dad who was a great, caring man, as I've said a million times before, so whoever this joker is not really that important to me, though I kinda dug his younger sister quite a bit. At any rate, when BFKAS and I walked out of the funeral home, we both agreed that I really didn't look much like any of them; she also admitted that without a blood test, she couldn't be 100 percent sure if he's it. And that's a-ok with me, y'all; I have enough family to last me a ooooong time without adding any more to the mix.
Prior to going Wednesday night, though, she and I talked on the phone for about an hour -- mostly about politics and Crackhead and all that crap -- and she said, "Well, now that we've solved the world's problems, you need to call your sister," to which I chuckled lightly and said, "In due time." She says I'm missing out on knowing my niece and nephew, who CA has confirmed are just the bee's knees. And I know it, and it's always kind of made me sad. Thing is, I have this urge to explain to her why I'm reluctant about that even though I'm under no obligation to fill her in.
It's not that I have a problem with my sister, at least not in a way that I hate her or feel that she's evil incarnate. We're nothing alike fundamentally, true, but that never made me HATE her; it's just something you deal with. What bothers me is that she thinks I have some ulterior motive, which I just don't get because what could I possibly want from her that I never had in my own family except siblings? If I really wanted the whole husband/house/2.5 kids business, I would have it by now, and it would be my own, not something I stole from her or anyone else. And I just don't feel the need to prove that over and over and over for the rest of my life. The other thing is, I would like some reassurance that I get to present my side of the story when she and I get into one of our horrendous fights and that it'll be heard and taken under advisement, but I think that's something BFKAS and I are going to have to work on.
So, how do I tell BFKAS about my thoughts, or do I?
So yeah, met the alleged sperm donor, and that was what it was. I mean, I have a dad who was a great, caring man, as I've said a million times before, so whoever this joker is not really that important to me, though I kinda dug his younger sister quite a bit. At any rate, when BFKAS and I walked out of the funeral home, we both agreed that I really didn't look much like any of them; she also admitted that without a blood test, she couldn't be 100 percent sure if he's it. And that's a-ok with me, y'all; I have enough family to last me a ooooong time without adding any more to the mix.
Prior to going Wednesday night, though, she and I talked on the phone for about an hour -- mostly about politics and Crackhead and all that crap -- and she said, "Well, now that we've solved the world's problems, you need to call your sister," to which I chuckled lightly and said, "In due time." She says I'm missing out on knowing my niece and nephew, who CA has confirmed are just the bee's knees. And I know it, and it's always kind of made me sad. Thing is, I have this urge to explain to her why I'm reluctant about that even though I'm under no obligation to fill her in.
It's not that I have a problem with my sister, at least not in a way that I hate her or feel that she's evil incarnate. We're nothing alike fundamentally, true, but that never made me HATE her; it's just something you deal with. What bothers me is that she thinks I have some ulterior motive, which I just don't get because what could I possibly want from her that I never had in my own family except siblings? If I really wanted the whole husband/house/2.5 kids business, I would have it by now, and it would be my own, not something I stole from her or anyone else. And I just don't feel the need to prove that over and over and over for the rest of my life. The other thing is, I would like some reassurance that I get to present my side of the story when she and I get into one of our horrendous fights and that it'll be heard and taken under advisement, but I think that's something BFKAS and I are going to have to work on.
So, how do I tell BFKAS about my thoughts, or do I?
