Sunday, November 28, 2004
Smells like teen spirit
Just when I bought it that Cousin Nancy was on the mend and getting her shit straight, I get a call from Crazy Aunt last night at 1:20 a.m. that Nancy was missing; she hadn't checked in at 10 like she was supposed to, and then when Crazy Aunt called around to the places that Nancy said she was going to be, her little friends first were covering up for her, then didn't when my uncle showed up at their doorstep. Crazy Aunt then called the police, and they said she wasn't officially a missing person, but if they caught her out with someone, like, say, driving around, they would haul her ass back to juvie because she was in violation of her probation. Anyway, she waltzed in at 9:20 a.m. this morning and promptly got busted for lying; the first thing Crazy Aunt's going to do tomorrow? Call her probation officer to get a restraining order on loser boyfriend. Then she's going to call mall security to make sure loser boyfriend isn't hanging around at the kiosk Nancy's working at, call her therapists to get her in more than once every two weeks and then call her pediatrician to set up a drug test.
Meanwhile, I have no clue as to what to say to her. I mean, she clearly fucked up, but it's not like I've been the bastion of morality where she's concerned, either. So, anyone got any ideas as to what I say to her without looking like a total hypocrite?
Oh, and we still don't know where she was last night.
Meanwhile, I have no clue as to what to say to her. I mean, she clearly fucked up, but it's not like I've been the bastion of morality where she's concerned, either. So, anyone got any ideas as to what I say to her without looking like a total hypocrite?
Oh, and we still don't know where she was last night.
Sounds like Crazy Aunt and Uncle have said enough to her by now, no need for you to add your $0.57 (adjusted for inflation).
As for if she pulls you into the fray, I’d suggest you tell her that you can’t help her. She’s up to her neck in a bad situation and the person she really needs to look to for help is herself. Other than that there’s really nothing you can say that won’t either piss her off for siding with her parents or drag you into her personal hell (which I’m guessing you, like me, have enough of your own personal hell to work out and no time to go foraging in anyone else’s)
(Editorial Humor)
If that doesn’t work, tell her to go find Christ. That seems to work for most people in her state. (Mentally and geographically). Substituting one dependency for another is the American way. Just go ask all the poor bastards addicted to Nicorette gum.
(/Editorial Humor)
Your friend,
Dix - The token Jew of Indiana