I have standards. Oh, yes.

1. No addicts. Recovering is okay, tho.

2. Teeth cannot be green. (Don’t ask why I had to add that one in.)

3. Personal hygeine is a must. Shower regularly. Wash hair. Brush teeth.

4. Must like cats. Or at least, my cat.

5. Must be accepting of gays.

6. Must be tolerant of my spiritual beliefs.

7. No racists.

8. No ultra conservatives.

9. Bad manners will turn me off pretty fast.

10. Use of non-standard academic grammar will also turn me off.

11. Must be financially stable.

There’s a start. I’m sure I have more because I’m picky. Dammit.

Damn, girl, you were unnaturally hot. Not that you ain’t now, but with a good haircut (yes, I realize that was hot at the time but the football helmet look? Not you) you would have been extrordinarily dangerous. Got any ass shots I could, erm, hold up with one hand? Aw, nevermind.

I’ll have you know those feathers are ALL MINE, my friend, so don’t disrespect the hair. Also keep in mind it could’ve been a LOT worse. A. LOT. For example, I didn’t have my mall bang until ‘89.

And you know, I always thought my face was too ... harsh, maybe, when I was younger, like my nose was too big for my features. I think I’ve matured into my looks pretty well, but what I wouldn’t do to be that size again. Holy shit.

Actually the face was and is good, in a kind of a perky almost osmondy kind of way.

Mall bang? I think you’d have done better with a susan powter crew than with mall bangs, but that’s just me- big hair leaves e cold.

Oh, must we even talk about 80’s hair? I’m still trying to recover from the fact that the new man saw my senior prom picture (with the mall bangs). I’m not sure which was more embarrassing: my hair, my dress, my date, or that my mom still has it on the wall in our upstairs hallway.

Lookin’ cute broad I think I remember those pants. Is that too weird?

I’m sure you do! I can’t remember if I got those jeans in 8th grade or freshman year, but I do remember I had somewhat of a “uniform” consisting of my black Polo with the red Ralph Lauren guy, those pants and my Dexter TAN boat shoes (because I didn’t want to be like everyone else with standard brown). In the winter, I switched it up with a yellow oxford.