Not that it isn't quality time when we do talk, because it is; he's wonderfully bright and funny, and we've always had such an easy rapport, even if the rest of the world thinks he's a prickly curmudgeon, which he is, make no mistake. But we talk about once a month, and it's usually pillow talk, and that bugs me (yet makes me happy, too, make no mistake).

If I were a betting broad, my Spidey sense tells me that he may still be "involved," and that he wants to talk to me about that relationship but can't because I've kinda put the kabosh on that. See, I really tried to be a shoulder to him, and sometimes I still really want to -- no, seriously, I do -- because he's my friend, and he doesn't talk to people easily most of the time (again, curmudgeon). But one of two things happens when I do: 1) I get hurt, or 2) if it's not going well, I tend to get all superior, as in "Boo-YEAH, Fucker. Can you FEEEEL me now!?!?!" and although that feels really good, it's not fair to him. It's not even that I want him to hurt as much as it is I want him to know how I feel. But I guess it's easier to avoid me than have a giant elephant sitting in the room with us.
Oh, whatEVER.