Somewhere between Bell's Palsy and death
Monday, November 29, 2004
So much for honesty and public officials
Before I launch into my latest work-related tirade that I can actually talk about, take a gander over at my blogroll: You'll notice that an old favorite of mine, "It's Funny Because It's Shit," had been put back onto the lineup. That's because its author, the always-excellent, always Scottish PeeBee Curtis, is done with his vay-cay and has decided the world just hasn't heard enough about why he would never properly execute a cumshot. And do you know how I know this (that he's blogging again, not his feelings about cumshots, although I know that now, too)? Because he has me on his Kinja favorites list. For me, that's huge, because I'm a yooge fan of PeeBee's.

And now, the drama: Tomorrow morning at 10 a.m., I'll be sitting in a rather high-on-the-totem-pole school official's office listening to him backpedal on what he said for my big story from last week. In my three years of free-lancing, I've never had this happen, so this ought to be a treat. My guess? He had his ass handed to him by certain parties that I'm loathe to mention by name.

Story below:
Posted by Broad7:43 PM • (0) Trackbacks
Sunday, November 28, 2004
Gettin’ you in da Crimmus spirit
Sent to me from the Emperor Warrior Kendar, who's sitting across from me on one laptop while I'm on the other.
Posted by Broad11:34 AM • (0) Trackbacks
Smells like teen spirit
Just when I bought it that Cousin Nancy was on the mend and getting her shit straight, I get a call from Crazy Aunt last night at 1:20 a.m. that Nancy was missing; she hadn't checked in at 10 like she was supposed to, and then when Crazy Aunt called around to the places that Nancy said she was going to be, her little friends first were covering up for her, then didn't when my uncle showed up at their doorstep. Crazy Aunt then called the police, and they said she wasn't officially a missing person, but if they caught her out with someone, like, say, driving around, they would haul her ass back to juvie because she was in violation of her probation. Anyway, she waltzed in at 9:20 a.m. this morning and promptly got busted for lying; the first thing Crazy Aunt's going to do tomorrow? Call her probation officer to get a restraining order on loser boyfriend. Then she's going to call mall security to make sure loser boyfriend isn't hanging around at the kiosk Nancy's working at, call her therapists to get her in more than once every two weeks and then call her pediatrician to set up a drug test.

Meanwhile, I have no clue as to what to say to her. I mean, she clearly fucked up, but it's not like I've been the bastion of morality where she's concerned, either. So, anyone got any ideas as to what I say to her without looking like a total hypocrite?

Oh, and we still don't know where she was last night.
Posted by Broad7:31 AM • (0) Trackbacks
Saturday, November 27, 2004
Couldn’t say it better myself
More on Richard Grey, this from Post-Trib columnist Jim Gordon. It was in today's paper.
Posted by Broad7:01 AM • (0) Trackbacks
Friday, November 26, 2004
Funeral for a friend, pt. 2
Received word today that one of my editors, the venerable Richard Grey, died in his sleep last night. He'd had a heart attack a couple weeks ago and then got some sort of infection in his heart and lungs, but he was on the mend and was going to be released for the holiday. The last time I talked to him was about a week ago, when I called just to see how he was doing. He was still in ICU, and we weren't on the phone for longer than a minute, because I didn't want to inundate him with all the usual questions about "What happened? How do you feel?" and whatnot. I just told him that I wouldn't bore him with all that, but that I hoped he was feeling better.

Below is a poem our mutual pal Izakar kept of his from many years ago. It's but a mere glance into his genius.
Posted by Broad12:59 PM • (0) Trackbacks
Thursday, November 25, 2004
Into the car and down the road to White Rose Inn we go …
Yeah yeah yeah, Pilgrims on a boat, Indians, whatever. Just pass me some of the damn pumpkin pie.

Happy Thanksgiving, yo.
Posted by Broad6:49 AM • (0) Trackbacks
Tuesday, November 23, 2004
Progress (Call off the cavalry)
The Snidge is back where she belongs, tired but no worse for the wear. So, my fears of axe murders and Headcase's fears of little Snidge pieces spread out all over Lake Michigan are unfounded, and we can all just breathe in ... breathe out. Yes, that's better.

Oh! Speaking of good mental health, finally picked up my meds today. Of course, I picked up only half of them because the PAP hasn't processed my form yet and I had to BUY them at $65.89 for 15, but I can deal. Starting to feel better, too; this morning was a little too close to being out of control, closest I've been to it in awhile -- real hyper and jittery, and not being able to settle down without serious effort. But I was amazingly productive, which is unusual when I'm on warp speed. When it used to happen on a regular basis (like, 97 percent of my life), I just spun around in figurative circles and never left the house.
Posted by Broad9:04 PM • (0) Trackbacks
School was never this cool for me
I would KILL to be in this class: Lookit
Posted by Broad1:42 PM • (0) Trackbacks
There’s a reason I call him my smelly guy
Elliott, aka "Weenie Been" and my youngest, has just taken a bite of Mommy's White Castle cheeseburger. The outcome of this canNOT be good.
Posted by Broad11:55 AM • (0) Trackbacks
Well, life WAS going good …
On the one I beat I cover regularly, I came in at a time when the school board was changing. Because of its efforts, the Indiana State Board of Accounts handed down a special audit that mandated its former administrators pay back the school corp. a few grand for inappropriate spending (i.e. using school credit cards for personal purchases, claiming personal time as school time -- you know, just like Enron and shit). Well, another school system in NWI has decided to hire one of the former administrators, and I scooped the story up here -- with all the warts that I'm sure she wanted to go unnoticed. And not only that, but now? The paper of record in the town she's going to is REQUESTING COPIES OF THE AUDIT, preparing to find out if it's all true, which it is. Wheeee!

Of course, in the story I wrote about the ball Saturday night, I screwed up where the award that OUR PUBLISHER WON originated, and I feel like a big ass.
Posted by Broad7:04 AM • (0) Trackbacks
Monday, November 22, 2004
And then? There were two
Does anybody know anything about this guy? Because our friend The Snidge completely missed our evening out tonight without calling or e-mailing, and that means one of two things: Either the two of them were, um, INDISPOSED (cough), which is forgiveable; or the guy's an axe murderer, which is NOT. Any help in this matter would be appreciated.

Oh, and she? Is the cutest thing in the world. Go encourage her to write more. And be sure to pray for Kaffy's warm, mucous-filled corpse that she no doubt turned into this afternoon after I got off the phone with her. Great googly moogly, she was miserable.
Posted by Broad6:35 PM • (0) Trackbacks
Friday, November 19, 2004
Still on about the pants
Ok, I know I've made this complaint before, but it bears repeating, especially on the eve of a formal event that I'm covering tomorrow night: Why can't I find a freakin' pair of pants that doesn't make me look like a Goddamned sausage!?!? I'm covering the event, which means I don't have to whip out either of my floor-lengths (which is good, because I'm reasonably sure I'd look like a sausage in them, too), but all I have is my black dress pants, which I can wear with the new chocolate brown sweater with the bling on it, but why should I have to when Old Navy has a pair of brown pants pin-striped with pink that would match the majority of the bling perfectly!?! Because Old Navy doesn't make pants for women with short legs and big asses, that's why. Crap. Hopefully tonight when I go out for my industrial strength support thing-y later, I'll maybe find something that's not low-waisted.

Meanwhile, it's been kind of a fucked-up week story-wise -- not as in I haven't been working, but as in, I've been chasing a whole bunch of shite and have gotten off my blog-reading sked (with the exception of Mac), so if y'all haven't noticed me creepin' round your doorstep, that's why. I'll make with the catch-up on Sunday. I can tell you that I think things with me and BFKAS are going to come to a head and possibly soon, but more on that later.

[UPDATE: WE HAVE PANTS, EVERYONE! Ralph Lauren is my new, pretend, mega-rich-mega-older boyfriend, because he makes brown, flowy pants that I'm going to totally rock tomorrow, especially after Crazy Aunt hems them to not be mega long. And -- and! -- they were on sale ($38, marked down from $95 (!) ). And you ready for the best part? I won't have to wear the generic support garment thingy that I bought; I'll get to wear my Spanx Power Panty, which is, like, the best. thing. EVER. for holding in the flub. Now if my hair will just not succumb to the freakin' rain and humidity ... And yes, Ogger, I'll make sure to get a shot of me looking like a girl. You haven't even seen my new specs yet, but chances are, I won't be wearing them tomorrow.]
Posted by Broad12:50 PM • (0) Trackbacks
Still not dead yet
I'll catch up with y'all later.
Posted by Broad9:19 AM • (0) Trackbacks
Tuesday, November 16, 2004
No no, gadget
Some more Mactastic information, this time about y'all's beloved TiVos: Lookit

Now, as I wrote to my Congressmen, just how exactly does Congress expect to enforce the part about not skipping over commercials? By spyware? Well, my man Pete's already voted against that in the Internet Spyware Prevention Act, so I'm guessing that's not an option. The only other option I can think of, then, is that police task forces will have to be formed, and they'll go out to each and every day to each and every household to see that people aren't fast-forwarding past the previews on videos or DVD, or aren't skipping them when they record on their TiVos. (Wonder if that would fall under Homeland Security? I'm sure they could get a grant for it or something.) Either way, those are gross violations of privacy, not to mention expensive to enforce.

Your choice, folks.
Posted by Broad12:18 PM • (0) Trackbacks
Monday, November 15, 2004
Meeting of the minds …
The good news: Our pal The Snidge will be in Chi-town this weekend, so she, me, headcase and hopefully Ms. Kaffy will be hooking up for some mad silliness in the big city (or in G.I, if I can help it; I told Snidge I would give her a personal tour of the infamous Gary without sending her home in a body bag.)

The not-so-good: Does anyone know where Sheri of Angsty fame went? I must've missed when she said she was taking down or relocating her blog, because she ain't where she's supposed to be, and I miss her!
Posted by Broad8:26 PM • (0) Trackbacks
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It is the job of a good person to be honest. To be self-aware. To deliberately explore the fault lines of your character and try desperately to not inflict suffering in this strange, ghost-ridden world of worked and fabricated objects. Sometimes the jobs of writer and good person coincide. But more often they don’t. There are way more writers in the world than there are good people.

100 things
Info meme #1
Typelogic says I'm an INFP.
Check my weekly astrological groove here.

Give it to me, baby.

Pssst ... My birthday's Feb. 3, and I want this, and this, and this ...


The Make-Believe Oral Cancer Foundation (M-BOCF) is now accepting donations on my behalf. Won't you please help those of us who jump to hideous conclusions regarding our oral health and help me get a root canal or two!??:



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Broad said: Like I said, my feelings are complicated on the matter, so ... I’m interested, however, in Her Highness’ thoughts on… ...[go].

Caterina said: ARGH!!! Not to deny you your goddess-given right of reflections and wishing what might-have-beens, but this guy was straight up… ...[go].

Wholovesya? said: By the by, guess who was most nasty about the charitable giving?  The frigging church.  My church and my mom’s… ...[go].

Wholovesya? said: By the by, I’m not the only one I know.  I have friends who work at soup kitchens because they’re… ...[go].

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