Region Broad

Somewhere between Bell's Palsy and death

Friday, March 25, 2005

Would a turd by any other name smell as bad?

I've spent the better part of the last 45 minutes perusing this site (lookit) of which the author trolls baby name BBSes and just SKEWERS her findings. It's fucking HILARIOUS. To wit:

The following list was written, literally, with no spaces. I've divided it up so each name gets the special attention it deserves.

Beautiful Welsh names (girls) Aelwen(fair brow)
Arwen(Fair)
Briallen(primrose)
Drudwen(precious)
Ceindrych(Elegant, fair)

Ceiros(Cherries)
Cerian (to love ) Ce pronouced as KEE
Crisiant( crystal)
Faleiry (welsh form of valerie)
Fflur( flower)

Eiddwen Eira, Eiry (snow)
Enfys (rainbow)
Eswen(strength)
Eurwen(fair and golden)
Gwennant(fair stream)
Gwennog(smiling)
Gwylan(seagull)
Gwyneira (white snow)
Haf(summer)
Heulwen(sunshine)

Iorwen(lord, beautiful)
Llio Meinir(maiden)
Meinwen(slender n fair)
Melangell(sweet angel)
Saeran( an irish saint)
Tegan(beautiful)
Wynne(fair, blessed)

BOMB WALES NOW! Seriously, take any one of these words, put "Marie Johnson" behind it and try not to laugh. Now imagine the kindergarten teacher trying to say Fflur on the first day of school. That's right. ...

"Put Marie Johnson behind it"!?!? Comedy TITANIUM, y'all.

This reminds me of when my pal Laura, before she had her darling chitlins, would call me when she got her class rosters before the first day of school. Fast forward one year to Open House, and she encountered a parent who inSISTED her daughter's name is pronounced, "Tatiana." But how is it spelled? "Titania." And she wasn't kidding, folks.

Posted by Broad • Site pimps •Social comment n' shit •Wait ... what!?!? •

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It is the job of a good person to be honest. To be self-aware. To deliberately explore the fault lines of your character and try desperately to not inflict suffering in this strange, ghost-ridden world of worked and fabricated objects. Sometimes the jobs of writer and good person coincide. But more often they don’t. There are way more writers in the world than there are good people.

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