Friday, September 09, 2005
You don’t need help to poop on a cracker
Guess who I'm going to be seeing, if not meeting, on Tuesday?
No, seriously. Take a guess.
(Big hint: He tends to make bizarre analogies as he's giving advice ...)
Indeed, it would be the man himself, Dr. Freakin' PHIL.
Yeah, he's totally doing a mall tour of Chicagoland, and he's coming to our neck of the woods, and the paper wants ME to cover it! How cool is THAT!?! Of course, they also said I couldn't ask him advice on how to deal with Mother, but what other advice would he possibly give me other than shooting her and dumping her cold, dead remains in the Cal Sag*?
See, y'all with your 401Ks and health insurance -- that's fine for you fancy people. I on the other hand, get to meet Dr. Phil. How you like me NOW!?!
No, seriously. Take a guess.
(Big hint: He tends to make bizarre analogies as he's giving advice ...)
Indeed, it would be the man himself, Dr. Freakin' PHIL.
Yeah, he's totally doing a mall tour of Chicagoland, and he's coming to our neck of the woods, and the paper wants ME to cover it! How cool is THAT!?! Of course, they also said I couldn't ask him advice on how to deal with Mother, but what other advice would he possibly give me other than shooting her and dumping her cold, dead remains in the Cal Sag*?
See, y'all with your 401Ks and health insurance -- that's fine for you fancy people. I on the other hand, get to meet Dr. Phil. How you like me NOW!?!
Wouldn’t you like him to give Seahag a nice Dr. Phil bitchslap?