1. Do you try to look hot when you go to the grocery store just in case someone recognizes you from your blog? You're talking to the person who got chastised by her editor for wearing a t-shirt that says "Shut up and drink your beer" to a city council meeting. Do I SOUND like someone who puts out that much effort? 2. Are the photos you post Photoshopped or otherwise altered? Only for redeye. I DID censor a photo last week, but only because it made me look like I was losing my hair. (In actuality, it was because I needed a dye job REAL BAD.) 3. Do you like it when creeps or dorks email you? I got Kaffy e-mailing me all the time, and she's in MENSA, for God's sake, so it's fair to say that I embrace the dork. (mmmmwuuuuah, Kaffy!) As far as creeps go, it depends on the creep's intention. Then I may freak out, especially if they've figured out where I live. 4. Do you lie in your blog? Haven't been blogging log enough TO lie, but honestly, there's nothing in my life that warrants lying about. No, really. I mean it. 5. Are you passive-aggressive in your blog? There was one day when this twat reporter at work really crawled up my ass, and I put out a little message directed at her. But I was coy about it only because the blog had been up for a few days, and I didn't want to give her the satisfaction of knowing she'd gotten to me if she was reading. Otherwise, I tend to be more passive-aggressive in real life, but I'm working on it. 6. Do you ever threaten to quit writing so people will tell you not to stop? Again, I haven't been writing long enough. If I did quit writing, though, I'm pretty sure having people telling me not to wouldn't be motivation, but it probably would keep me keeping on. I just hope my meds never stop working for that to happen. 7. Are you in therapy? If not, should you be? If so, is it helping? My therapy? Effexor-XR 150, Babies. Seriously, I've done the therapy thing four different times in my life with three different therapists, and while all of it was useful, my shit's chemical. 8. Do you delete mean comments? Do you fake nice ones? Do people really fake nice comments? Wow. That's some desperation. As far as mean comments, please refer to Mac's fine print. She does a stellar job of handling it. 9. Have you ever rubbed one out while reading a blog? How about after? Everyone's got needs, yo. 10. If your readers knew you in person, would they like you more or like you less? Well, the thing is, I tend to write like I talk, so if you can handle reading me, you're not missing much with the live version. I do, however, have a loud voice, and that's off-putting to some people. But I'm not overtly gassy or anything. 11. Do you have a job? Define "job." Do I make money doing work? Yeah. But I'm a free-lancer, so some people don't consider that real work. 12. If someone offered you a decent salary to blog full-time without restrictions, would you do it? Absolutely. 13. Which blogger do you want to meet in real life? Well, I already count Emperor Warrior Kendar and Zog as dear friends, but everyone else on my roll has a standing invite to NWI. Some more than others, but I'm pretty easy to get along with. 14. Which bloggers have you made out with? I'm lucky if I get made out with once a month, never mind by anyone in the blogosphere. 15. Do you usually act like you have more money or less money than you really have? I'm a free-lancer. Nuff said. 16. Does your family read your blog? My crazy aunt and uncle were, but they're temporarily unwired. And I've been debating on whether to let my brother know about it, because I do say some fairly disparaging things about his mother (The BFKAS), and I don't know that he needs that stuck up his ass. But he's pretty smart, so he could be. Otherwise, I don't think the rest of the family's computer-savvy enough. 17. How old is your blog? Went live Feb. 23. 18. Do you get more than 1000 page views per day? Do you care? Definitely not, and no, because a) I get my narcissism fed everyday by the work I do, and b) I'm terrified of the whole bandwidth issue. 19. Do you have another secret blog in which you write about being depressed, slutty, or a liar? No, because there's enough of them out there already without hearing my shtick. 20. Have you ever given another blogger money for his/her writing? No, because I don't usually have money to spare. Now causes, I might eventually. 21. Do you report the money you earn from your blog on your taxes? It would depend on how much I made and if my accountant thought I needed to. 22. Is blogging narcissistic? Does Christina Aguilera look like she reeks of ass? 23. Do you feel guilty when you don't post for a long time? Yeah, because the whole purpose of me starting the blog was to force my non-reporter voice out of bed, and I can't do that when I'm laying on the couch watching Fox. 24. Do you like John Mayer? I LURVE John Mayer, despite the fact that he has a reputation for having let success inflate his head. 25. Do you have enemies? I suppose I do, but for the past few years, I've been trying to let go of the crap and forgive -- not because they necessarily deserve it, but because I'm tired of thinking about it all the time. It's even kind of working. Sort of. 26. Are you lonely? The one guy and I were talking about this very thing this morning, in fact. I'm sure I'll get to the point where I REALLY must have an SO in my life, but really? It's easier on my soul if I have a place of my own in which to retreat. 27. Why bother? Mother, is that you? And when did you learn how to get online?
Oh, whatEVER.

It was a snowstorm-y night a day or two before my 20th birthday, and I went to visit him after work. (I worked in a chi-chi women's clothing store in those days.) He lived about six or seven miles from me, and the easiest way to get there was taking this back road. So, I'm driving along in the snowstorm, and about a mile and a half away from home ... oh, yes. A couple 360-degree spins into telephone pole.

It was poetic. I laughed upon impact, and then I started screaming, because how the hell was I going to explain to Mother why I was coming home that way when I told her I was going to be doing something else that wouldn't have involved coming home from Dyer?

Luckily, the friends I said I was going to be with lived in Illinois, which you could conceivably get to from the road I was on, so I made up some cockamamie excuse as to how we went someplace out that way -- but not before Dad getting in my car and going over the story with me so we'd both have it straight. How's THAT for a cool dad?

Another time, I played said boyfriend on the phone because Mother didn't want me seeing him anymore, so Dad volunteered to be the one to tell him/me. There were millions of times like that.
Oh, whatEVER.

Nothing like driving around like a freakin' hillbilly.
Oh, whatEVER.

Long story short, I was backing away from the front of the crib, and another dude was too, and SLAM. He was driving a Blazer, so all that happened to him was a turned-in bumper. But me? The body shop is estimating $1,800, and that's if insurance doesn't total a '95 Corolla. Oh, and I have a $500 deductible. Fuck me.

Pictures later. Sigh.
Oh, whatEVER.

What Color is Your Brain?
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[Horked from Jess]
Oh, whatEVER.

My dad is Lee R. Quinn, born June 30, 1934 somewhere in Chicago, to Marie and Raymond Quinn. Two sisters, Eileen (Jim) Beil and Bernice (Ron) Ireton, both still living. Scads of nieces and nephews and grand nieces and nephews. Graduated Dyer Central High School in 1952; futzed around a year or two before enlisting in the Army, 101st Airborne. Got out in 1957 and started college at Indiana University, majoring in education. Met Anna Jean Matura circa 1960; married her June 15, 1963; graduated from IU with a master's degree in English education in 1967, I believe, after doing his student teaching at East Chicago ... Roosevelt, if memory serves me right.

Started teaching at Dyer Central in Dyer, Ind., which moved and turned into Lake Central High School in St. John, Ind., where he taught for 21 years. He taught all levels of high school English, but had the most passion (and best result) with the "developmental" seniors, or what we would call "LD" today. Adopted his only daughter in September, 1970. (That'd be me, yo.) Was one of the most popular teachers to walk Lake Central's halls. (Ask anyone. They'll tell you.)

Retired from teaching in 1985 to try his hand at selling insurance, which he did part time for years. Failed at it and eventually got back into teaching freshman composition around 1992, first at Indiana College of Commerce (a court-reporting school), then at alma mater Indiana University (Northwest) and finally IVY Tech State College. Loved fishing, hunting and anything wilderness-related. Loved to read, draw and, sometimes, write. Was quiet and preferred living in his own head. Loved Tim O'Brien novels.

Died Aug. 30, 2001 after a six-month battle with aggressive non-Hodgkin's Lymphoma. He was 67.
Oh, whatEVER.