I've alluded a couple times to the fact that although BFKAS thinks she knows who my sperm donor is, she really doesn't, because there's two other men listed on my real birth certificate and adoption papers. Well, last month -- on my birthday in fact -- the dude she thinks (read: wishes, because he was allegedly hot back in the day, and that's somehow important) is the one is back in town and happened to be at her crib when CA called. This was interesting to me, so CA called her back and talked to him, seeing if perhaps he wanted to talk to me. At the time, he told CA that he wasn't sure, but he'd think about it, and I was like, Ok, that sounds to me like a "whatever," so whatever, right!?

So last night, I get home and check the caller ID to find a call from a someone with the same last name as the alleged sperm donor (ASD), but the person didn't leave a message. I thought, "Hmmmmm. That's a coinky-dink," and left it at that. When I found the same name on my caller ID today when I got home from my assignments, I decided to check the messages straightaway. And lo and behold ...

After calling Tara, Kaffy and Laura in somewhat bemused awe -- tried to get Greta, too, but she was probably passed out asleep -- I decided to call him back.

I won't bore you with all the details because, well, it wasn't honestly that memorable -- except, of course, for the part where I tell him "See, here's the thing: BFKAS told me that she thought you were the father but that she had to list this other guy's name on the birth certificate for whatever reason. But then on my adoption papers, there's a third guy, so honestly? I don't know what to tell you." Then, per Kaffy's instruction, I asked him his blood type. He's O-positive, which I thought would definitely rule him out but doesn't, because he could be a heterozygous positive, and she could be a heterozygous A or AB, because I'm A-negative. (Here's the 'splanation; she can't be an O like I thought, Kaff.)

I mean, he seems like a nice enough guy: He's a cook out west somewhere, and he came here to visit his ma when his van broke down, so he doesn't have any cash and is trying to find a gig out here so he can get back to his crib and get his equipment. Sounded fairly intelligent, if not a whole lot racist and a little bit brain dead from all the dope I've been told he's smoked over the years, though. Oh, and he's jonesin' hard for some smokes but doesn't have the money to buy any.

So.

Nope, don't feel anything about it one way or the other; like I've always said, he could be a turkey baster, for all I care. He's not my Dad. I will admit that I found it kind of sweet that he sounded almost disappointed upon hearing he might not be the sperm donor, but not enough for it to really make a difference. Meh.
Oh, whatEVER.