I just got done sending my e-mail list of pals a note that I got off my reporter newsletter about how those Godforsaken ribbon magnets that everyone is so jacked up about putting on their vehicles can actually maul the paint job if you leave them stuck in one spot for any length of time. And to that I say, "Heh."

You want to do something to support the troops? Use the $5 you pay for the stupid thing and buy some beef jerky or toilet paper or smokes or just use the money for postage and give it to an organization who's sending stuff to the troops already overseas. After all, the soldiers can't see your smarmy self-importance when they're dodging bullets in Iraq. Fer fuck's sake.

And before anyone gets all pissy that I'm not patriotic, I covered a Christmas party at one of our National Guard Armories yesterday in which 376th Battalion is leaving this week. Believe me, they don't need you to ruin your fucking cars on some hollow sentiment. They need your prayers.

P.S. Same goes for breast cancer.